To Future Me

I wrote the following exactly 1 year ago (Jan 21, 2021), as part of a work assignment. It’s a bit more personal than most blog posts I write, but I think that’s probably for the better (you know, to help with my relate-ability haha :). Anyway, I wanted to publish it for me to have as a reference, and in case it speaks to others, too.


As a part of the Healthier U January Assignment, I am to:
“write 3 to 5 things you are grateful for today and write a letter to your future self”
Today, I am grateful:

  1. That Jesus lives and speaks. Lots of difficult conversations going on right now within our house church on account of me and my opinions on certain matters that others strongly disagree with (I’ll leave it vague on the Blog). Hoping when I read this in 1 year we can look back and see the hand of God in all of it. But I’m so thankful that Jesus speaks.
  2. To have a prudent wife. As God showed me a day before Shana and I married: “Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the LORD.” (Prov. 19:14). I constantly am reminded of this as I watch my wife lovingly correct me and point me to the ways of Christ (and model this herself).
  3. For the bright sunshine out my window. It reminds me of Christ’s mercy that is new every morning. Lord, may it be a new dawn for us here.
  4. For food and drink (and a surplus of it) in my home.
  5. For the hope and assurance of being with Christ together, forever, without tears, pain, suffering, or sin having even a remote chance to join us…all through the hope of the gospel.

Future me:
I know it’s only a year out, so maybe you can kick this message out another couple decades as well. As I write this letter, my life looks a lot like:

wake up around 7am, busy kids, get breakfast ready, busy kids, read the word and pray, busy kids, start my work day, busy kids, schedule appointments and my day, busy kids (well, at the moment I’m the only one in the house, so it’s a bit peaceful right now :), take a break (choosing whether to spend it ministering to my family, others, or edifying myself), make sure dinner is scheduled, finish my work day, busy kids, eat and help get people ready for bed, busy kids, put them down to sleep (waiting to see who doesn’t stay down), get the house in order for the next day, decide whether to spend the remaining time ministering to my family, others, or edifying myself, around 10pm go to bed.

There it is in a nutshell. Then, I feel other pressures on top of this related to tending the house church we are part of, ministering to others I’m connected with, and thinking about how to best take care of the family (lately I’ve been pondering/praying about a larger living space [note: as of 3 months ago, we did move to a larger space]).

Definitely feel too busy to even think about being bored LOL (Laugh Out Loud, in case future me forgets that acronym LOL again). But I’m happy for this opportunity to sit in a peaceful house and contemplate my life in the future (and in the present). I keep going back to 1 Chronicles where we read things like: “Adam, Seth, Enosh, Kenan…” (1 Chron. 1:1). Those 4 names encapsulate 3,657 years of life. I can’t imagine their adventures, struggles, daily drudgery, highs, lows, etc. And God doesn’t record that. Instead, all we know is that they were born, passed on their seed, and died. In the same way, I pray that it would be said of us that we were faithful to pass on the word of God, and the gospel, as it was entrusted to us. I fear we take up too much time with things that don’t matter because we lose sight of the ultimate goal. Lord, bring us back to your path and plan.


Amen,

Brian

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